Letting Go

Learning to let go has to be one of the hardest parts of parenting.  I have been told that I have always been a hover-copter parent.  I thought I always had a "reason" to be this way due to the circumstances at any given time.  I am slowly realizing that I have done them no favors always protecting them from the natural consequences of their actions.

For over 18 years I sheltered Kory from the things he didn't seem to be able to handle.  I was totally unaware of the reasons he withdrew whenever he was in an unfamiliar setting.  Could never put my finger on the reason he would stand before me when confronted with something and shut down.  Made excuses for his lack of participation in a group setting.

I never thought Kory would make it out of high school due to his grades and the horrible bullying he had to put up with.  It wasn't until he was almost done with high school he was diagnosed with Asperger's which is on the Autism Spectrum Disorder. 

The diagnosis hasn't changed any of the issues he has dealt with during his life, but it has given me the awareness that I must learn to let go and stop hovering so that he will be able to make it out there on his own.  It took until a few months ago for me to accept that I can't change or fix this problem.  I now have to change my focus and seek out resources for him to use to learn how he can navigate his way.

I am so thankful for The Gray Center support group. It has given me the support I need to take the right steps in letting go.